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Saturday, July 12, 2014

Special Report: Vatican announces: “Miracle Pool?”

By:   James Cunningham
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St. John XXIII St. John XXIII

BRAKING NEWS: The Vatican Congregation for the Causes of the Saints has released a new proposal to improve the Beatification Qualification process concerning the need for miracles by venerable candidates. The agreed solution involves the creation of a miraculous pool/bank of certified miracles that occur within a particular time period from which those candidates, such as the Pope, now St. John XXIII, can be attached and credited with. The hypothesis concerns the theological attachment of the Communion of Saints and how they share in a spiritual life of events and how too, they can cooperatively share in the miracles during their time on earth.


“From those who have the greatest ability to those who have the greatest need.”*


It is not as if miracles were not plentiful during the Twentieth Century; there are thousands of documented events attributed to the holy monk St. Padre Pio alone. The question is in the neo-theology of sharing this resource so that the new egalitarian and ecumenical Church of post-Vatican II can prosper by them. Since we now have eliminated or at least avoid hierarchical references and prefer equality of status it can be presumed fair to consider the relationship of sainthood in a certain guideline time period and the miraculous events of that period; rather than emphasize an individual’s direct involvement with the miraculous event.  


In the specific case of Pope St. John XXIII not having any miracles of record and factually living at the same time period as St. Padre Pio one has only to appreciate that a factual corresponding relationship did occur; not that this is particularly necessary. Said relationship transpired when St. Pope John XXIII had St. Padre Pio restricted from any contact with the public. This prompted St. Padre Pio to pray for St. John XXIII and through this spiritual interaction miracles are presumed generated, at least theoretically. Similarly Blessed Paul VI and St. John Paul II and even John Paul I can be seen as being existentially co-responsible for the miracles which occurred during the time period which also included St. Padre Pio.


The Revolutionary Concept:

Within the framework of logic, wisdom and Liberation Theology this hypothesis is easily comprehensible and clearly, a reasonable view of how valuable this revolutionary intellectual asset appears equitable. This methodology will not only shorten the time-consuming investigation into the heroic and virtuous nature of a candidate’s pathos but, open the doors to sainthood for millions of those who were previously prohibited from entering. The proposal deemed likely to be welcomed by Pope Francis is in its final phase of composition and it is scheduled to be completed by late this August for formal presentation to His Holiness.


Projected Benefits:

Now more than ever before there is, at least, the hope that anyone can become a Saint with very little effort and celebrate too their very own Feast Day of remembrance. There is also hope that this process can be made ready before the candidate is post-mortem; this would benefit Pope Francis should he decide to beatify himself. Private capital is now being raised to set up a trust fund so that the poor who need help in promoting their personal saint cause will be assisted. Donations will be taken up at the third parish collection starting in July. We expect that this will bring an even greater focus of awareness on the humility, equality and the ecumenical generosity that characterizes so much of the neo-Church apparatchik. More information will be forthcoming as this process develops into a formal Moto Proprio and enters into the reformed hermeneutics of continuity within the Vatican Library for Ecumenical Beneficence. It is further speculated that even non-Catholics and atheists may now have a chance to find their own way to sainthood within a recognizable and rationally relativistic new and humiliated non-judgmental Church.


Recapitulation of the Research and Development Committee:

In as much as the Vatican Research and Development Committee struggled with the usual paleo-traditionalists in a spirit of Vatican II dialogue achieving negative results; it is therefore recommended and that we state clearly: that the Traditionalists will be censured by the Committee and that a permanent “Visitor” be assigned to all Traditionalist enclaves. Order is to be preserved and the peace within the communities will be maintained. Resistance is futile.  

*Karl Marx.



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