New Hate Map, SPLC Initiatives Announced

 

By James Bendell

 

(A-CNN) The Southern Poverty Law Center has announced two new anti-hate initiatives as part of a new fundraising campaign.  At a September 2, 2012 press conference SPLC spokesperson Eyma Whyner made the following remarks:

 

As you all know, the SPLC runs on a shoestring budget.  We’ve had to overcome the smears against us published in Harper’s Magazine, which said: “Today, the SPLC spends most of its time—and money—on a relentless fund-raising campaign, peddling memberships in the church of tolerance with all the zeal of a circuit rider passing the collection plate. "He's the Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker of the civil rights movement," renowned anti- death-penalty lawyer Millard Farmer says of Dees, his former associate, "though I don't mean to malign Jim and Tammy Faye."

 

How can we be expected to fight hate on a measly $30 million annual budget?  Our buildings and operations have lots of overhead.  If any hate breaks out in the United States, we’re all over it like stink on a monkey.  You can’t do that on a soup kitchen budget.  Just the overhead alone is killing us. Although we pay SPLC founder Morris Dees about $300,000 a year, that’s a lot less than Obama’s banking friends make.  And it doesn’t reflect all the overhead associated with his job.  And our multimillion dollar buildings come with high operating costs.  Also, overhead.  Did I mention the overhead?”

 

SPLC’s new initiative is two-pronged:

 

1. Publishing a new, more comprehensive Hate Map of the United States, showing the primary regions and types of hate that have reached epidemic proportions.

 

2. Historical research to uncover hate groups throughout history.

 

Below is the SPLC New and Improved Hate Map of the United States:

 

 

 

Below is a list of brand new hate groups in history uncovered through the rigorous research of SPLC’s underpaid staff:

 

Donner Party

300 Spartans

Little Rascals (except Buckwheat and Farina)

Jamestown Colony

The Cartwrights (Ben, Adam, Hoss and Little Joe)

The Etruscans

Hoboken Numismatic Club

The Bronte sisters

The Flying Wallendas

The Pep Boys (Manny, Moe and Jack)

The Baptists, Anabaptists and Ana-anabaptists

Sheffield Wool Shear Workers Union

Crimean War Veterans

Queensland Bocce Ball Club

Snow White and four of the Dwarves

19^th Century Ventriloquists

Von Trapp Family singers

 

This historical research will continue, provided there is adequate funding.